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www.ajollyhaven.blogspot.com
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O. C. C
Over. But Confused. And Complicated still.
Monday, November 08, 2010
It wasn't supposed to turn out this way. But it happened. In a way which was super unpredictable. It was unusually serene. And i didn't think it was strange until more was discovered. I dont like how things were developed without me knowing a single shit. Situations i wasnt allowed to have, yet there were double standards. I dont like being kept in the dark. I dont like the supposedly truth, but actually it may all be excuses. I dont like how it felt to be replaced. I dont like how things turned out not the way it was supposed to be, with full of unknown. I dont like how i felt i did my best to handle this, yet there were things happened within things which was fucking out of control. I dont like how much i want to ignore this shit yet it keeps coming back. I dont like how i am still imagining all the unknown - what could have happened, and what will happen down the road, without me knowing a fucking thing. I dont like how amicable i want this to be, yet i dont know if this situation can allow that - Im not that magnanimous. I dont like how ambiguous the whole thing is right now, although it's bloody over. And i fucking hate the fact that someone much younger could advise on a mature issue like this. And the fact that the advise and solutions are biased because the parties may be emotional. I desperately want to change all the DONT LIKEs to HATE. But i cant allow myself to be like this. It's bloody over. I have to stop thinking about this! ♥ Blogging in A Jolly Haven @ 3:12 pm
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Audrey Ng.
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